The Day I Turned 45

I turned 45 last Tuesday and rewarded myself with a day off from work. Two weeks before my birthday, I booked a dinner cruise in Manila Bay in Sun Cruises for myself only which prompted my booking agent to ask why I chose to be alone on my birthday. Nosy, little prick isn’t she?

I started my day firing some shots at a firing range somewhere in Metro Manila courtesy of an influential friend of mine. I ate lunch at a small eatery near his office and had small talks with the carinderia owner, which ended up with her declaring that we are now friends. That’s one of my most admirable trait, I make friends easily. *insert laughter*

Back to my birthday celebration, I left my friend’s office at around 4PM since I had to be at the Esplanade Seaside Terminal in Mall of Asia by 5PM to register and get my ticket for the cruise. The boat that would circumnavigate me in Manila Bay is docked here. I made it at exactly 5PM and relieved that there was no long line. I got my ticket after a few minutes and paid a Terminal Fee of Php30.00 before going inside the pier area to wait until boarding time.








At exactly 6PM, we were allowed to board. There were a few groups of people going to the cruise with me. There were a group of Koreans and a group of Japanese with three men and a woman. Ahead in the line were a large group of office workers who I assume was there for a celebration of someone’s birthday or promotion. Looking around, I was the only solitary soul but I don’t mind. I am ecstatic that I am taking this cruise.



I was ushered to my table in the upper deck (Hooray! I’m in the upper deck). I kept looking left and right and sort of reminded me of a very excited child. And like a child rewarded with her favorite chocolate, I was jovial when the boat started to head out into the open sea. It was sunset and the colors of the sky were a varied shade of orange. It was so beautiful.




After the usual demonstration of how to use the life vest, I stood up from my table and walked towards the railing and took pictures.



It was so refreshing to feel the seawind even if it smelled a bit different. I felt like the water was siphoning all my stress for the past few months.



I went back to my table when they started serving dinner. The plated dinner, by the way, goes with the package that costs only Php550.00 on weekdays and slightly higher during weekends because they serve buffet dinner on weekends.





So here’s my assessment of their food: the soup would make you doubt your taste buds, the breaded chicken tasted bland, the beans were cooked in oil and not butter, but the beef was okay. By the way, the Shirley Temple didn’t come with the dinner package, I was charged separately for it.

I was still happy though because I didn’t come here for the food. I came here to de-stress and get away from everything. And the wind and the water were perfect for helping me get that relaxing time for myself.

It was already dark when we started to sail back. And what a sight it was when we were nearing the docking area.



I never regretted spending my birthday alone. It gave me a fresh, new insight on things but here’s what my mother said about that tiny adventure I had.

“You are crazy for taking that cruise alone.”

I wonder how she would react if she learned that I had some target shooting earlier in the morning.

A Letter To My Eldest

I was cleaning up my office drawer when I came upon this, a draft of the letter that I sent to my son as part of their school retreat when he was in his Senior Year in highschool. He is currently in his Senior Year in college. Yeah I know, it's too shocking to know that it was four years ago when I last cleaned my office drawer,
Anyway, here's what the letter says:

Hi Pao! :)

You know I don't write things like these because I'd rather tell these to you over a bottle of beer but hey, this is what retreats are for - to read your parents' rants and make rants of your own. :)

More than a decade ago, I had this small, temperamental boy who used to love my invented stories during bedtime and/or tantrums. He also loved eating under the table because he believed he was a puppy trapped in a human body. Well, now the boy is all grown up and I guess I am only left with memories (if only I had taken videos of those moments, hehe). Anyway, thank you son for sharing that life with me (and this life too, as if you have a choice, hehe). Seriously, you and your brothers served as my strength during those difficult times. Your faith in me never faltered and thank you for that. I could daresay you are a man now Dude! That's how much I believe in you. :)

You know I never say I love you often but when I do, I am saying so much more. I am telling you that I have never known love as unconditional. I have never seen anything as beautiful nor held anything as precious as you in my arms. I love you and I'm proud of you when you've accomplished something special. But you need to know that I love you with your flaws, your shortcomings, your imperfections - even those you keep to yourself.

Don't ever think, "Yeah she loves me now, but if she only knew --- she wouldn't be so proud" because I love every corner of your heart and mind - even the places that are dark and filled with shadows. That is how great my love for you is.

I maybe an unconventional mother but I assure you that I am giving you and your brothers all that I have got, and I love you more than a conventional mom can ever love her child. Whatever path you may choose, I will always be there to guide you. Remember what I said, I went through darkness to gain wisdom so I could light yours and your brothers' paths, so do not be afraid of straying, of making mistakes because I will always be there to catch you, and I will always understand.

I love you Kuya and welcome to a much adult life ahead of you! *fistbump*

Mom :)